How Do You Help a Child Who Doesn't Like School?

by Julie Diamond, OCT

This blog post will take you about 3 minutes to read. If you’re short on time, bookmark this page and come back to it during the school year

The summer break is a good time to reflect and plan ahead for the next school year. It's not uncommon for children to go through phases where they express a dislike for school. However, when this aversion becomes a consistent issue, it can impact their academic performance and overall well-being. As parents and caregivers, there are several strategies you can employ to help your child develop a more positive attitude towards school.

Understanding the Root Causes

1. Identify the Problem:

• Open Communication: Have an open and honest conversation with your child about why they don't like school. Are they struggling with a particular subject? Are there social issues, such as bullying or trouble making friends? Understanding the root cause is the first step in addressing the problem.

2. Observe Behavioral Patterns:

• Look for Clues: Pay attention to when your child expresses dislike for school. Is it on specific days or before certain classes? Behavioral patterns can provide insights into specific triggers that make school less enjoyable for them.

Strategies to Improve School Experience

1. Create a Positive Morning Routine:

   - Smooth Start: Ensure your child starts their day on a positive note. A consistent morning routine that includes a healthy breakfast and some quiet time can set a positive tone for the day ahead.

   - Avoid Morning Rush: Plan and prepare the night before to reduce morning chaos. This includes packing school bags, laying out clothes, and ensuring that homework is completed.

2. Engage with Teachers:

   - Collaborate: Work closely with your child's teachers to understand their perspective and seek their advice. Teachers can provide valuable insights and may be able to implement changes in the classroom to make your child feel more comfortable.

   - Regular Updates: Keep in regular contact with teachers to monitor your child's progress and any ongoing issues. This collaborative approach ensures that both you and the teachers are on the same page.

3. Make Learning Fun at Home:

   - Educational Games: Introduce educational games and activities that align with your child's interests. Websites like Khan Academy and National Geographic Kids provide excellent resources for young learners.

   - Interactive Projects: Encourage hands-on projects that relate to what they're learning in school. For example, if they're studying plants, you could start a small garden at home.

4. Address Social Issues:

   - Build Social Skills: Help your child develop social skills through playdates, extracurricular activities, and community programs. Websites like Active for Life offer resources and activities to promote physical and social development.

   - Discuss Bullying: If bullying is an issue, address it immediately. Speak with school authorities to ensure your child is in a safe and supportive environment. Resources like PREVNet provide information on bullying prevention and intervention.

5. Promote a Growth Mindset:

   - Encourage Effort: Emphasize the importance of effort over perfection. Praise your child for trying hard, even if they don't get the highest grades. This helps them develop a growth mindset and reduces fear of failure.

   - Set Realistic Goals: Help your child set achievable goals and celebrate their successes, no matter how small. This can boost their confidence and motivation.

6. Create a Supportive Home Environment:

   - Homework Help: Be available to help with homework, but avoid doing it for them. Guide them through difficult tasks and encourage them to seek help when needed. If the material is out of your comfort zone, get a tutor. You can view our available tutors or give us a call. 

   - Stress Management: Teach your child stress management techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and taking breaks when overwhelmed. YouTube offers guided meditations and relaxation exercises for kids or check out apps like Calm. 

Seeking Professional Help

1. Educational Psychologists:

   - Professional Support: If your child’s dislike for school persists despite your best efforts, consider consulting an educational psychologist. They can assess your child for learning difficulties, anxiety, or other issues that may be affecting their school experience. Check out our friends at Wonderwise Psychology who can help. Their website is listed on our website here. 

2. Counseling:

   - Emotional Support: Counseling can provide your child with a safe space to discuss their feelings and develop coping strategies. School counselors or external therapists can offer valuable support. Resources like Pathstone Mental Health has free Walk-in Clinics and a support line for students in the Niagara Region (Ontario). If you are in Vancouver, here are the resources for students as listed on the Vancouver School Board website. Or for students in Toronto, here are the mental health resources in your area. 

Helping a child who doesn't like school requires patience, understanding, and a proactive approach. By identifying the root causes of their aversion, creating a positive and supportive environment, engaging with teachers, and making learning fun, you can help your child develop a more positive attitude towards school.

Remember, every child is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Stay flexible and open to trying different strategies until you find what works best for your child. With your support, they can overcome their dislike for school and thrive academically and emotionally.